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How to cool down this year’s family gatherings

If you, like millions of Americans, are traveling to spend time with an extended circle, you may be thinking more than usual about how to help the group connect (or just not blow up). Conflict resolution facilitators are taught to hold healthy heat. And sometimes that means turning the temperature down, while still maintaining connection.

 

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How to cool down this year’s family gatherings
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How to cool down this year’s family gatherings

If you, like millions of Americans, are traveling to spend time with an extended circle, you may be thinking more than usual about how to help the group connect (or just not blow up). Conflict resolution facilitators are taught to hold healthy heat. And sometimes that means turning the temperature down, while still maintaining connection.

Read More
The pre-gathering texts that make your palms sweat
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The pre-gathering texts that make your palms sweat

Gathering with intention has a way of bringing up squirmy conversations that most of us would rather avoid. When most people would rather sidestep a delicate interaction, the artful gatherer steps in. Read more about how to handle the three kinds of texts that haunt every host (and what to do about them).

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Turning up the heat in your gatherings (without burning down the house)
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Turning up the heat in your gatherings (without burning down the house)

It’s natural to want to avoid tension, especially in group settings. Most of us are taught to keep things comfortable and conflict-free (I come from a family of ostriches myself!). But when we prioritize avoiding tension above all else, our gatherings become vague and diluted. After all, heat is relevance.

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Sometimes, you just gotta throw the better party.
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Sometimes, you just gotta throw the better party.

Rick Ingrasci, always said: “If you want to create a new culture, throw a better party.” Building joy around a shared purpose is at the very center of artful gathering, and it’s something we can all learn to do.

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Why Designing for Introverts is Better for Everyone.
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Why Designing for Introverts is Better for Everyone.

You can gather well even if you weren’t the star of your high school theater production. Quieter super hosts tend to rely on design rather than, say, the force of their personality to create artful gatherings. And you can, too.

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5 ways to gather without breaking the bank
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5 ways to gather without breaking the bank

The artful gatherer is more focused on meaning than money, on crafting connection than celebrating consumption. And one of the wonderful things about meaning is that while it’s not cheap, it is free.

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Feeling Disconnected? Your room setup might be at fault.
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Feeling Disconnected? Your room setup might be at fault.

One of the biggest mistakes we make when we gather is we accept the physical setup we’re given, even when it doesn’t serve our needs. But by taking a second to help the room find the right physical formation, we can tighten the social contract and help remind our gatherers, after all, why they are there.

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Meetings are now your culture carriers
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Meetings are now your culture carriers

It’s easy to get frustrated with hybrid meetings. And they’re increasingly important. When people can work from anywhere, and some are in the office, and many are remote, the primary way we now experience each other is through meetings. It's time to get good at them.

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Wait, do we need a ceremony for this?
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Wait, do we need a ceremony for this?

When we pay attention, we use ceremony to mark (or invent) notable transitions. We invite others to witness and partake and help us make something that can feel nebulous visible.

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5 Ways to Quickly Build Belonging
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5 Ways to Quickly Build Belonging

In our gatherings, it’s easy to confuse “belonging” for “sameness.” Belonging is about more than just our shared connections or interests: it’s about feeling a part of the whole without having to all be the same.

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Filling your gathering cup
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Filling your gathering cup

Gathering with intention and care is a life-affirming practice. Whether navigating life changes, feeling the heaviness of the world, or breaking free from an uninspired rut, making time for community is vital.

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Three things I’ve learned in 2023
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Three things I’ve learned in 2023

As we wind down 2023, I wanted to take a moment to close out the year together. (Because, just as an artful gatherer spends time opening their gathering, they also take time to close it.)

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Gathering in Tender Times
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Gathering in Tender Times

This season, especially in the midst of so much loss and grief in the world, I invite you to ask yourself how you might gather in ways that are nourishing for you and the people around you.

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Meaning As Medicine
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Meaning As Medicine

As we enter a season of end-of-year festivities, I invite you to reflect on the gatherings that have nourished you, and which you feel grateful to have attended. Why do we experience some gatherings as a balm, whereas others feel procedural?

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3 Mistakes We Make When We Gather
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3 Mistakes We Make When We Gather

As we enter fall, I wanted to share with you the three most common mistakes we keep making when we gather (myself included). And what to try instead.

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And the Summer’s Gathering MVPs Are….
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And the Summer’s Gathering MVPs Are….

What do Taylor Swift, Greta Gerwig and Beyoncé have in common besides creating culture-defining work that has given the entire economy a post-pandemic boost? I’ll give you one guess

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5 Ways to Bring Family Together this Summer
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5 Ways to Bring Family Together this Summer

So often, when we get together for family reunions or barbecues or milestone birthdays, there's a lot of joy and milling around and chit chat, but it doesn’t always turn into something more.

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The Power of a Good Rule
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The Power of a Good Rule

A digital community, like a gathering, is a temporary alternative universe created (and bound) by a set of agreed-upon rules. And it’s often only when those rules are changed do we start to see them, value them, and recognize how much work they were doing to create an experience we valued.

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Why the More is Not Always the Merrier
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Why the More is Not Always the Merrier

Generous exclusion is the intentional drawing of a temporary line for the good of the guests and to help activate and fulfill a gathering's purpose. By closing the door, you create the room. Here are five reasons why.

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5 Ways to Reinvent Traditions
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5 Ways to Reinvent Traditions

I’ve been thinking a lot about weddings lately and wanted to share with you five questions to help figure out which traditions to copy-paste, which to edit, and which to cut altogether.

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